Terrified Shepherds?

From the stories I've heard, shepherds have to be pretty brave guys. They are roaming a "wilderness" not like the cool lush fields I've imagined. We've heard the story of David (from the Bible) killing a bear and a lion. And reaching or climbing over cliffs to rescue a wayward lamb takes some kind of courage. There's a reason we're not all rock climbers.

So why were the shepherds terrified when the angels came to announce birth of a baby in the nearby village? I heard the thot yesterday that they were in awe -- no, more than awe or amazement; actually terror -- of the Presence that they sensed. The Bible says it was "the glory of the Lord". I've been wondering just what that is.

All the things I know about God, and much more, wrapped into a "Glory"! Power, justice, strength, mercy, grace and forgiveness -- on a scale beyond my best mathematical comprehension. I can't imagine just what that would be, but I do believe the likelihood of terror. I am too weak to be all I want to be, even tho I know I should. I just mess up too often. Ask my family. Being in that presence would likewise bring ME to terror.

I don't think "the Glory" came to threaten the biblical "bouncers". The story says the angels came in peace. Somehow, that means peace for me today too -- Christmas and more. I'm still a possibility.

Whispers

I had a great day yesterday! Those hyped, hormonally-driven 7th graders again. Ha! I took along some baby candy canes and red vine licorice to keep them motivated ... and the day moved along nicely.

The fun was in watching their behavior. Who'd have expected the best students in the class to come back, begging (in their coniving ways) for another candy cane? Two even came back at the end of the day to see if I had any left! I watched an ADD kid with unreadable homework pull out his Nintendo with Sudoku on it, as he ran back and forth from laptop to desk, multitasking. I heard another student talk about a 20 yr old sister-in-law dying from leukemia. Another student told me I smelled good.

WOW! The payback for investing in a couple bags of candy. Really? Maybe it helped, but I think it came from listening, not to what they were saying, but what they weren't saying. I'm trying, but I still have a lot to learn about listening.

I'm trying to listen to the whispers of my heart. When it's frigid like today, to thoughts of those with cold homes. When I have a headache, to thoughts of those who've just found cancer. When I miss my kids, to thoughts of homeless who haven't seen theirs for much longer than I.

I need to listen.......

The Right Gift

So many things lately remind me that we're all a bunch of weaklings, trying to do the right thing.

I showed up for work an hour late yesterday -- got the days mixed up! YUCK!

Someone else is trying to improve his leadership style 'cause the family survival depends on it.

Another special person realizes how far short he falls from the abilities he thinks he needs.

We're all weak, insufficient, fumbling, NOT ENOUGH!

Maybe we're made with limitations that our Creator hopes will awaken us to our lack of invincibility. Maybe this awareness can awaken us to new relationships that will enhance our love and compassion. Maybe this love and compassion is really at the base of what every career, every obligation is about.

What do I need this season? I think I really need a greater sense of contentment. I'm not meant to save the world. I AM meant to do my best at the job where I serve today. Yesterday I needed patience -- and compassion -- for hyped, hormonally-driven seventh graders asking "how old were you when you learned about Santa Claus?" Today I need to accept that I can't make and bake all I want in the next two weeks. Tomorrow I need to just enjoy the joys of the children around me.

Sure, I'm a weakling, but not a failure. I can listen, but not fix. This Christmas I want to revel in what I have, what I can glean without accumulating. Pleasure. Smiles. Peace. Hope.

And I do believe that it exists because of the One Perfect Gift of Christmas.